When your ex first broke up with you, what did you do? Did you lay down and take it, or did you go out fighting like a champ?
Well if you're like most guys, I already know what you did. You fought verbally against the breakup, coming up with a dozen or so reasons why the two of you should stay together. You argued to keep the relationship alive, and then presented a lawyer-like case for continuing the romance.
When these tactics didn't work, you probably started bringing up the past. You reminded your ex of all the good times you shared together, and begged her not to throw everything away.
In the end though, she still broke up with you. And the reason she was able to do this is because your girlfriend was prepared for your response. Like a seasoned chessmaster with long flowing hair, your ex was three steps ahead of you. She already knew what you would do and say, and she had her counter-arguments all set and ready to go.
Emotionally, she had an even bigger advantage. Because even as the pain of potentially losing your girlfriend finally began to sink in for you, your ex showed very little remorse at all.
This is because your girlfriend broke up with you days or even weeks ago. In her own mind, you were already gone. This is why it was so easy for her to let go, and why she seemed so cold and clinical about ending the relationship.
So she announced the breakup, and you INSTANTLY reacted. You went into immediate panic mode, and you fought the breakup with everything you had. You convinced yourself that you NEEDED her back, and that keeping your girlfriend was more important than anything else in the world. And the one huge reason why you did all this was:
Because Your Girlfriend Rejected You.
Stop and read that last statement again. Think about it for a minute.
Do you want her back because she's the most awesome girl in the universe? Or do you want her back because it's a natural response to being rejected?
In most cases, it's the latter.
Yeah sure, your girlfriend is cool and you'd probably enjoy continuing to date her. But up until that moment she broke up with you, you were taking her for granted. Up until the second you realized you were going to lose her completely, you weren't half as concerned about how awesome she is.
We want something most when we stand to lose it. Picture a kid who owns a toy he hasn't played with in months. For weeks he hasn't thought anything about it. But the second he sees his brother playing with that toy, he suddenly wants it again.
So is your girlfriend a toy you haven't played with in months? Hopefully not (or you have much bigger problems). That said, chances are good you neglected certain aspects of your relationship. This led to you being blindsided by the breakup. And the minute your girlfriend was suddenly out of reach, that's the same minute it became important to you that you get her back... and FAST.