Why She's Still Watching You, Even After The Breakup
If you think your girlfriend dumped you without looking back, think again. Your ex's feelings didn't drop off at the breakup speech; this is a girl who loved you enough to date you. So after she breaks up with you? She's certainly looking over her shoulder. She wants to see how you handle yourself after the breakup, and she does this for two big reasons:
1) Pure, unadulterated, feminine curiosity.
2) Your ex wants to know that she made the right decision by dumping you.
Yeah, that's right, your girlfriend is looking for justification. She wants to know that ditching you was a good idea, and that she'd be better off without you.
Ideally, you'll fall to pieces without her. You'll chase her a little, become an emotional wreck, and woefully regret the day you ever let her go. This is the type of reaction your girlfriend wants to see, because it blows her ego sky high. It makes her think she really is the shit, and that every other guy would be lucky to have her.
For this one important reason, you need to be on your very best behavior after the breakup. You need to do JUST the right things, and put forth EXACTLY the right vibe if you want to ultimately win your girlfriend back. How you handle yourself right now, after she dumps you, will determine whether you'll get her back or lose her for good.
So, still want your girlfriend back? You'll need:
Strength - Not just physical strength (although that never hurts) but mental and emotional strength as well. Your girlfriend wants a man who's strong and decisive; a guy who stands up for himself, and who doesn't take shit from anybody - including her. She wants to know she's protected.
Confidence - Nothing beats confidence. Women are instinctually attracted to men who are sure of themselves, and will always choose a confident guy over one who's always testing the waters before jumping into the pool. And yes, you can be confident without being arrogant.
Charisma - Charismatic guys will always have a girl hanging off their shoulder, and will constantly have something to do. They become leaders without even trying, because charisma is a naturally attractive trait for both sexes, and always equates to spontaneous fun.
Optimism - Are you always doom and gloom? A glass half-empty kind of guy? Recognize and fix this. Optimism is extremely attractive, because it makes everyone else feel better about themselves. Girls are always attracted to guys who constantly see good things on the horizon.
Independence - Few things are more unattractive than neediness. If you've ditched your friends, have no outside interests, and have been spending all of your time glued to your girlfriend's side, chances are you've lost your independence. Develop your own thing, and your own agenda, and your ex will start seeing you as having a life of your own again.
Happiness - Examine the end of your relationship. Were you unhappy? If so, it made your girlfriend unhappy as well. Stress, depression, falling into a rut... these things dragged your relationship down, and sucked all the fun out it. If you want your ex back she'll need to see you happy again, or there's no incentive for her to take you back. In the end, the real reason you date someone is to have a good time.
These are the fundamental traits that girls are attracted to in a guy. You had some or most of them at one point, when your girlfriend first fell in love with you. To get her back, you'll need to exhibit these traits again... and probably even more than you did the first time around.
Now that you know all this, step back and take a good look at yourself. Are you sullen and depressed? Angry or bitter? Have you been acting needy or desperate around your ex girlfriend, in your attempts to get her back?
More importantly, would you want to date yourself again? Are you making yourself attractive to your ex girlfriend, or are you putting forth the type of negative vibes that will ultimately turn her away?
Alright, you get the point. Enough with laying the groundwork. Let's get started on the next step, and this is probably one of the most important:
Step 2: Damage Control & Counter-Rejection Techniques